As I sit here on this overcast, grey, cloudy morning, drinking a cup of decaf, organic coffee and listening to Chris Botti’s CD, To Love Again, I have been thinking about all the twists and turns I find in this journey I call life. I can never say my life is boring because I never know what the next day will bring. Sometimes…
it brings much joy, sometimes many challenges, and at other times much sadness. But all of it together helps to shape the person I become through the choices I make and how I choose to respond to each and every situation.
If there is one word that describes my life and how I choose to continue forward everyday it would have to be perseverance. I live and breathe that word every day. Without it, I’m not sure I could continue forward on some of the more challenging days. The source of my perseverance comes from my faith and influences every aspect of my life.
In college I was nick-named, pit bull, by my professors because when I got knocked down by these illnesses or life, I always got back up and continued forward. That really isn’t anything more than perseverance. It is this innate drive I have inside that pushes forward because I know that better moments are coming. I know that I have hope and I know that I have a future.
Just because I have CFIDS/FMS, which severely affects my capabilities, as well as my ability to be consistent, doesn’t mean it has to affect my determination, nor my faith. And that is what keeps me waking up every morning and thanking God for one more day.
Oswald Chambers one defined perseverance as,
Perseverance is more than endurance. It is endurance combined with absolute assurance and certainty that what we are looking for is going to happen. Perseverance means more than hanging on, which may be only exposing our fear of letting go and falling. Perseverance is our supreme effort of refusing to believe that our hero is going to be conquered.
That one characteristic probably sums up my life more than any other. I absolutely and completely believe that I have a purpose even in the midst of CFIDS and FMS. I don’t, for one moment, believe that my having these illness is a surprise to God. Therefore, I am confident that I will accomplish something great with my life.
It may not look like what I dreamed of or envisioned for myself and that’s okay. Even so, I have no doubt that some of my dreams will come true. They will just be dressed in different colors and textures.
Yesterday was a difficult and challenging day for me. Bronte found a new home with a wonderful family and a five year old little girl who was very excited to have a new pug! Perseverance is what got me through because I know in the end 3 things.
1. Bronte will have a wonderful life with a new family. One that she thoroughly deserves.
2. I will move through the sadness and move on to the next chapter in my life.
3. For now, I will be keeping Dekker. Losing both dogs would just be too much. So for the time being, I am going to see how things work with just he and I. In addition, I have received suggestions from my readers, such as Patricia, in ways I can help Dekker so it is not so physically challenging on me such as stairs for the bed. The last 18 hours have been much easier with only one dog. That gives me hope that perhaps I can keep Dekker and we can make this work for another 7 years.
Without perseverance I would never move forward to see what is possible just around the corner. I couldn’t live like that. I have to believe that there are great things coming if I will just persevere, believe and patiently wait for them. My dreams may not come true today, or tomorrow, but if I keep moving forward – persevering – I will embrace them and get to see them come to fruition.
Determined to continue forward
Youtube
RSS
Flickr
Digg
Delicious
Technorati
Twitter
StumbleUpon
Facebook
I’m so glad you found a good home for Bronte, but sorry that you’ll be grieving for a while. When you do, maybe turn your thought to the little child you’ve made so happy. What a great idea to see if you can do okay with just one dog. With perseverance…you just might be able to him.
Toni – Thank you and thank you for your suggestion!
I am so glad you found a home for Bronte…and that you are going to see if you can keep Dekker. Our pets are good company ~ maybe having just one will work out well.
Such a good post on perseverence. I really like Oswald Chambers quote. Hope you are having a good weekend.
.-= Renee´s last blog ..God Is In The Details =-.
Renee – I hope you are doing well!
What an inspiring post today. You had the words to describe
exactly what keeps me going – words I did not have. What a gift. Thank
you. So glad Bronte has a good new home. And also so glad you
are going to see if you can keep Dekker. I sure hope so.
A little aside – I’ll try to be brief. I know Renee (A Sofa with a View) from way back when she was editor of The Encourager Newletter.
I cannot get into her blog. I opened a google account (this
worked with “Living with CFS BLOG” – my first success in getting
into a Blog to leave a comment. Renee’s blog seems the same
but I cannot get passed those characters you have to type in.
Is it too much to ask you how to get in. Even Renee seems stumped
on this.
Patricia – I have to keep trying the letter combination until I get one right. Maybe it is just a matter of trying till your can read one and enter it right. Other than that, I am at a loss.
I had success posting to Living with CFS yesterday – after I
created a google account. Today it won’t let me in because
of the darn letters not matching. I’m about ready to give up
or pull my hair out. Why is it so difficult. Thank you again
that your Blog is visitor friendly. Keeping you in prayer
while you go through the necessary grieving process of giving up
Bronte.
Patricia –
(((Dominique))) I’m glad that you found such a wonderful home for Bronte, with a little girl that will adore her. My daughter has a love for our dog that I have never quite witnessed before. I bet Bronte will lap up all the love that this little girl has to give!
That is great to hear that you have experienced that things are easier with one dog. I keep you and Dekker in my prayers that you may be able to keep moving forward together.
Sending you lots of love & gentle hugs,
Nancy
.-= Nancy´s last blog ..Nervous System Meltdown =-.
Nancy – Thank you so much!
Tough thing to do… saying good-bye to a beloved pet. Ouch. Sorry you have to go through all this. I love the photo of the beaten up sign that says “Perseverance.” It almost tells the story alone. That word has significant value for me as well; I can so relate. Perseverance is one of the lessons I learned playing competitive tennis as a teen and young adult. I had no idea back then that it was the key to a more graceful survival of life’s bumpy road. I used it to set boundaries with relatives and in doing my best to not give up on loving them when it was oh so tough. I used it to move on when my daughter chose me as her punching bag. (Still living that out from time to time.) I used perseverance during a 48 hour labor before delivering my first child, and perseverance comes in handy time and again when I’m tuckered at night but still have someone else to care for before I can close my eyes and sleep. We just had to get rid of my favorite rooster with a party personality, because he is flawed and is trying to make babies with the hens that are not, and because his crow is extremely loud and bothers the neighbors. My daughter cried as we prayed for the LORD to find him a good home that won’t slaughter him as we drove him back to the feed store. And that’s when my husband’s common phrase reminds me to trust, saying: “But God…”
Love ya,
Whit
.-= WhitU4ever´s last blog ..Hi… I’m Whit updated Tue Feb 16 2010 7:33 pm CST =-.
WhitUrever- Great examples of perseverance! You could have written this post, Whit!
I see I asked you two times about those darn letters (spam catchers I guess) Sorry
that’s my cognitive memory problems. It just made me feel
better what you said. Try and try again – that perseverance!
Patricia – I just was on a site that it took me three tries to get it right! Sometimes I get it the first time, but other times I have to keep ‘guessing’ until I get it!
hi dominique
how are you?
in your words ‘In college I was nick-named, pit bull, by my professors because when I got knocked down by these illnesses or life, I always got back up and continued forward’
that is so evident in your daily writing and even in those trying moments you stayed strong spiritually.
lord i just pray for dominique this morning that your grace will always be upon strength to strengthen her and i ask that you keep raising up men and women in her live that would provide her with all the support that she needs.
i also ask that the zeal and passion she has wouldnt fizzle out and i pray you’d grant her so much peace.
Amen
.-= ayo´s last blog ..Don’t Give Up On Life =-.
Ayo – I read your last post and sent it everywhere but I still need to leave a comment. I have spent most of the weekend in bed. Thanks for the prayers Ayo. BTW, I am going to email you privately. I had an idea about the article – the timing of it – and I want to get your opinion on it.
Beautiful post, so encouraging!
You are touching many lives in ways that only God knows about – may He bless you and inspire you and give you deep peace. Hugs!
Jonie – Thank you so much! Hugs to you!
Beautiful post! Love the quote on perseverance. So glad you found a good home for Bronte.
.-= Laurel´s last blog ..A Room with a View =-.
Hoping you are getting better from lifting Dekker and the virus
you have.
I found a bookmark in my Bible last night and it made me think
of you:
“Lord, the newness of this day
Calls me to untried way:
Let me gladly take the road.
Give me strength to bear my load,
Thou my guide and helper be—-
I wil travel through with Thee.”
-Henry Van Dyke (Guideposts)
Patricia – That is awesome! Thank you for that. That definitely spoke to my heart!
What an inspiring post, Dominique!
From your definition, it sounds like perseverance has a healthy dose of optimism in it. That’s me, too.
I’m sure Bronte will be very happy with an active little girl to play with, and I’m glad you’ve maybe found a happy medium with just Dekker.
Sue
.-= Sue Jackson´s last blog ..Movie Monday 3/15 =-.
Sue – Thank you! Yes, optimism or positivism – whichever you call it – definitely plays a part in perseverance! Hope you are feeling better after your busy weekend!